(We saw this on the wall of our vet’s office, and
made a plaque for our wall.)
Rules Concerning Stray Cats.
Stray cats will not be fed.
Stray cats will only be fed dry cat food.
Stray cats may have dry cat food moistened with a little milk, but that’s all.
Stray cats may have dry cat food moistened with warm milk, yummy treats and tuna.
Stray cats will absolutely not be played with.
All right – Stray cats may be played with, but will not be given a name.
Tigger will not be allowed in the house.
OK, Tigger is allowed in the house, but only in the kitchen.
Tigger may sleep in the living room in a blanket-lined cardboard box.
Tigger will sleep in a special kitty comfort bed with non-allergenic lamb’s wool pillow.
Tigger will never be allowed to sleep on our bed.
Tigger may sleep on our bed, but never under the covers.
OK – Tigger may sleep under the covers and on the pillows.
The kittens will not be allowed in the house.